sometimes, i just want to say "i hate my fucking life". i don't. i just hate certain things about my life in this moment on this day- on certain days which happen to happen some days...
and then my husband reaches one of his perpetually warm hands over and holds my arm as we sit side by side. and i breathe.
i just need to recall my place within this existence. i am trapped in my own mind. there is no 'outside' of my gray matter.
gray matter in my plasma, in my bones, in my muscles, sinews, tissues. all of which will die. cease to exist. then where is My existence? where?
so, i eat. i drink. i pee. i poop. i bathe. i sleep. i interact with people and with the plants, places, things around me. i dance. i dream. i cry. i laugh. i cry and laugh some more.
i'll try to keep the laughter at greater odds. what more can i do?
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